First Bele Chere

Addie and I went to our first Bele Chere Festival today!

Even though I woke up with a red wine hangover and the mentality of "Fuck going outside," I managed to take a shower, get dressed, leave the house, get a speeding ticket (HO YEAH WINNING), find parking, and get to the Purina Ultimate Air Dogs show like 8 minutes before it started. hell yes.

After 20 minutes of watching dogs jump for distance into a pool (omg I love big, water loving dogs. Love them.), we walked through the streets filled with vendors, saw some great bands and musicians (including Skinny Legs and All, which not gonna lie--I watched only because I'm a Tom Robbins fan), watched the Big Gay Guys do loud street performances directly in front of the Jesus Hates Fags Guy who was preaching with a Mega Phone,

they were almost everywhere. Hilarious.

(next year, Addie wants to set up a "Mega Phone" stand next to the crazy religious guy. We'd rake it in.) drooled over the food courts, drooled over the hand-made $250 hippie bags (ok, that was just me), and actually came to an agreement on like, 50 different pieces of art. That's a new record.

It was an awesome crowd of rich, redneck, ghetto, homeless, hipsters who looks homeless (Addie's and My Favorite Game: "Homeless or Hipster"), and old people. And even though there was a shit ton of crowds, it was easy to maneuver and way more accessible than Artscape in Baltimore.

And it's in the middle of Downtown Asheville, which is one of the prettiest cities I've been to.

ahhhhhhh

I'd definitely go again. Except next time I'd go with money. Assuming that next year, I'll have money. Yeah. 

Other than that, it's been a blessedly lazy weekend (unlike every other weekend, which is only mildly lazy). There was a lot of this going on

Wirrrrre. And Project Runwayyyyy.

and this

muchos editing (in my Fat Pants. whaddup)

becoming this

aww right

I'd been editing/writing for a solid four hours before my DVD player started skipping too much for me to handle (it's like, 10 years old. Probably time to retire it.), so writing night turned into this

a more subdued approach

And somewhere along the line, I drank too much developed a wee case of writer's boredom.

Now, at least for me (and kinda for Addie, too) there's a definite difference between writer's block and boredom. Writer's block involves a lot of tears, lack of will to live, depression, processed food eating. Boredom is just me working for hours in Super Focus Mode, and suddenly just cracking. Like, I usually don't realize it's boredom until I'm so damn tense that I snap at Dog for breathing too loudly.

AUDREY'S CURE FOR WRITER'S BOREDOM

1. Change scenery. Go for a walk, run an errand, do something for a few minutes that's not writing. I went out and stood by my car for a few minutes. But I heard a creepy noise and ran back inside, lest I get raped by North Carolina Mountain Men. Or eaten by demon baby.

it could happen.

2. Change scenery again. If you can, write in a different area. I'm lucky to have 2 functional computers, and one semi-functioning computer, so I could have 3 work stations if I need them. And if I were so inclined, I could commandeer Addie's 2 computers and 1 semi-functioning computer and have 6 WORK STATIONS. Not that I've ever done that. That'd be weird. Right?

back to the Futon.

But moving didn't work, so I went back to the desk.

3. Break out the costume pieces. I'll put on gaudy scarves, shetland sweaters, and even a ridiculous pink tutu in order to drum up some inspirado. Yes, I look crazy, but it always works. But my most favorite: BIG ASS EARRINGS. Like, tacky shit that I'd never wear in public.

super tacky

4. Get a snack (also works as "change of scenery", combining 2 steps in 1. Look at you, multi-tasker!) Preferably something disastrously awful for you, like a toasted cheese sandwich. How do you make a toasted cheese sandwich?

• spread about 3 tablespoons of butter on 2 pieces of white bread each (the cheaper the bread, the better. I recommend 7-11 brand)
• place one piece of buttered bread, butter side down, on the toaster oven rack
• place 2 pieces of full-fat cheese on the bread. 
• place 2nd slice of bread, butter side up, on cheese
• toast until golden brown, or until you feel your arteries harden
• you can slice a tomato as a side, but that borders dangerously on "healthy", so it's best to ignore it. unless the tomato has been sitting the fridge and has become mealy, in which case, bon apetite!
• enjoy. rejoice in the fact that a toasted cheese sandwich beats a grilled cheese any day of the week.

5. Facebook stalk until you become weary of being one of those people who, at 3 AM randomly comment on posts by people they don't ever talk to. 


Now. This is a process that works for me. If you have any further tips, I'm totally welcome to them.


oh, and I'm starting Fast Food Free August tomorrow, on account of me leaping into my late 20's in 2 weeks (OMFFNGGOD), so I had a Bon Voyage of what would turn out to be terrible choices for a fast food bon voyage, including a Taco Party Pack from Taco Bell.

really?

I don't know why I can't make good decisions anymore.

Anywho, off to eat more soggy gross tacos (pride) and watch more Wire and do some general winning before failing at work tomorrow.

Hooray weekend!