We walked into the store, went up to the counter, and my dad announced that he was there to pick up his couch. This short woman with a stupid Kate Gosselin pixie hair cut and an ugly nylon sweater, tacky grey boots and a snotty look on her face stared at me, in my tunic and my leggings, and remarked snippily, "oh, is that your helper?"
I gave her a look that said Bitch, please, I've been moving furniture since I was old enough to walk. She stared back as she turned to get the manager.
My dad laughed and said, "it looks like you just got dissed." I just rolled my eyes.
A little known fact about me is that I am kind of a badass when it comes to moving furniture. Probably because my mom used to re-arrange the house a few times a month when we were growing up, and then once I got my own room, I also started rearranging every few months. I know how to tilt and lift and navigate bulky furniture in tiny rooms. I moved an Ikea dish buffet from one level of my parent's town house to another--by myself. It's an incredibly random super power that almost never comes in handy.
So not only did I engineer the strategy to get the giant couch out of the tiny bedroom, I did my equal share of hoisting and lifting and fitting (most of) it in my dad's SUV.
And as I returned the tape measure to the pixie haired See You Next Tuesday, she wouldn't even meet my eye.
Didn't think I could move a couch. Bitch, you ain't even cute.
Basically, I walked away feeling more smug and self-satisfied as the sales clerk who dared doubt me in the first place.
And to further prove feelings of self-importance and smugness, here are some progress pics of my new surroundings:
|my great grandmother's awesome dresser and my antique jewelry/make up cases|
|awesome string lights above the vanity mirror|
|can't stand how useless and awesome these are|
|lillies are the best (so are flannel red plaid |
|my garment rack "closets" which hide the buffet filled with Mary's wedding china|
|my bed, or, a place to stack pillows|
|including the pick me up dinosaur pillow pet Mary bought for me!|
|shiny basset hounds|
|my new sweet 'stache wallet|
|whoooaaaa who let the sepia tone out?|