Sad Girl Cometh

My job has a tendency to ride the waves of "feast or famine"--meaning I'm either staying til 8 or 9 PM working to get something done, or I'm in the print room stacking envelopes according to size because there's nothing to do. It's just the nature of the beast.

Sometimes, though, when it's painfully obvious that there's no work to do and I'm just "on call" for something, I start to dick around on the internet. One of my go-to time fillers is to google vintage inspired wedding dresses. Why? They're gorgeous. And hey, I'm a girl. It's essentially in my DNA to dream up wedding dresses. And I have a well buried love of fashion and I'm fascinated by clothes--but, I'm not very good at styling and I'm usually off the mark in some way or another. Basically, my style died somewhere in the 90's and I never got around to replacing it. Fashion is kinda like math to me. I'm good at basics, like addition/subtraction/jeans/cardigans/t-shirts/chucks; and bad at everything else, algebra/fractions/mixing prints/layering/accessories/high heels.

Things I Need in Real Life for $500, Alex

Anyway. Google image search Vintage Inspired Wedding dresses and you'll come up with some gems. They're lacy and theatrical and full of charm and character without looking cheap or gaudy. I love them.

get out of heeeere

And now that Facebook is my Big Brother and "suggests" which sites I might like in their sidebars based on what I've been googling, they of course suggested an ad for Dido Bridal, a site where you can get poorly made imitations of designer bridal gowns for 1/3 of the price. And of course, I clicked on it and wasted a good 30-40 minutes scaning through dresses. And then I found something very, very similar to a wedding dress I literally came up with in a dream two years ago and have fantasized about ever since but haven't come close to finding in a store. So that was pretty exciting.

And then I got an actual assignment so I stopped googling for a while. But then I finished the assignment and found myself with nothing to do. Back to the internet! Once again, on Facebook, there was an ad for Brilliant Earth, an ethical origin diamond supplier/jewler where friends of mine have had their wedding rings made. I figured, I already made the dress, why not make a ring? About an hour later, I settled on a  design. It's not my dream ring, but it was one of those "well if I had to pick a ring from this site and this site only" deals. I've never shopped for rings for myself, because I always assumed I'd have my grammy's ring re-set and use that. Turns out I'm steering away from platinum settings and am really liking rose-gold. #reallyimportantrealizations

At that point, I was starting to feel guilty about my work day sans-work, and decicded that I should stop dicking around and find something productive to do (like stack like sizes of post-its in the supply closet), when Kristin showed me a customizable home office page on Crate and Barrel. And I definitely got sucked into different shelving and desk options and debates with Kristin and better shelving and desk options (we're a bit obsessed with home offices/craft rooms) for the better part of an hour and a half.

And, then it dawned on me.

Wedding dress? check. Not even planning a wedding.

Engagement ring? check. Nowhere close to being engaged.

Future home office? check. Homeless. 

"Wow, I'm knockin' on sad girl door today," and that's when I received the following text from my mom:

That "wheeeeee" is the sound of the last nail being driven into my Sad Girl Coffin.

I'm gonna go home and donate all my Jennifer Weiner books now.

And maybe join a biker gang.